JOURNAL ENTRY: Wealth and Hellness

I have done so much damage to my body and mind over time. A rock and roll lifestyle and devil may care attitude is cool when you’re young, but when you’re pushing middle age it’s not only not a good look, but it’s straight up self-harm and torture (especially if you add all the little eccentricities that make up my mental illness and trial & tribulation).

As someone who’s an alcoholic and has a history of experiencing trauma it’s taken a long time to come to a place where I feel I’m finally starting to make progress. In clarity I’ve come to so many amazing conclusions and have found passion towards myriad, varying subjects. In sobriety I found myself whole and lucid for the first time in a long time. 

I always want to reach for the stars and get what I want right away. Maybe it’s the American in me. As a nation, as a culture, we’ve been conditioned to feel we should be able to push a button and get what we want all the time. Instant gratification.